Yesterday was a great day for the shirt. This shirt said, "I spread rumors." It is one of the guiltier guilty pleasures, and I got my first glare from someone! I was walking into Kresge and this girl walking out looked at my shirt, rolled her eyes and glared at me. I was pretty excited.
Then I went to the Cubs game, and realized how effective the shirts are when I actually go out instead of staying in my apartment doing work. I got the chance to tell a lot of friends I don't see very often about them, and also had my first conversation about them with a stranger. I met a lovely woman in the bathroom at Wrigley field, and our conversation went a little something like this:
Cubs fan: You spread rumors?! That's bad.
Me: Actually, I don't...or I try not to. This month I'm wearing different people's guilty pleasures. What's yours?
CF: Let me think about that. I don't spread rumors but I like to listen.
We walk into the stalls, side by side.
CF: I know what my guilty pleasure is! SEX!
Me: Oh, just sex?
CF: NO, lots of SEX!
Me: What's a lot of sex?
CF: No, a lot of sex, WITH MYSELF!
Woman in random stall: Honey, you have to have toys, do you have toys?!
CF: I have four, one in every color.
Me: (laughs uncontrollably)
That's the truth kids, no rumors here. Be looking forward to the shirt.
6 comments:
Hey girl in the yellow shirt, telling people about your sex life in the Wrigley Field bathroom, I overheard you too! You told me you were on a date with a HOT GUY!! I know you usually have a lot of sex with yourself ... so if you're reading this I hope you scored last night!
who's the hottie in the picture?
I wish people told me their dirty little secrets through bathroom stalls. How do you do it confession sessions?
Well, this woman's inhibitions were slightly lowered. But I thought if this ever turns into a performance piece I want to do it in a bathroom. I honestly felt like I was in confession at church. I should have told her to have sex with a man tonight as penance.
My guilty pleasure: I obsessive compulsively check blogs to see if people respond to my comments!
Rumors are always spoken is if intimately, ear to ear, but to be a rumor the author of the message has to somehow remain plural and faceless. That's the contagious, malicious power of rumors, that they appear to represent what "people" say, what "everyone" thinks...
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